Woody Allen Makes Me Giggle...

I sometimes think it's no coincidence that Dianne Keaton and I share the same birthday...
other times I think, man, if only I'd stayed in there longer, I could've shared my birthday with Elvis!
But, say-la-WEEE!!!!

Here's some quotes to keep you giggling:

I don't want to achieve immortality through my work... I want to achieve it through not dying.
Woody Allen

I was thrown out of college for cheating on the metaphysics exam; I looked into the soul of the boy sitting next to me.
Woody Allen

If only God would give me some clear sign! Like making a large deposit in my name in a Swiss bank.
Woody Allen

Life is full of misery, loneliness, and suffering - and it's all over much too soon.
Woody Allen

What if everything is an illusion and nothing exists? In that case, I definitely overpaid for my carpet.
Woody Allen

You can live to be a hundred if you give up all the things that make you want to live to be a hundred.
Woody Allen

The lion and the calf shall lie down together but the calf won't get much sleep.
Woody Allen